In case you didn’t already know our American cousins over the pond staged a subtle low key affair last night, modestly billed as ‘The Greatest Show On Earth‘. Still trying to convince the rest of the world that American Football is the best sport in the history of sport this year’s Super Bowl threw up yet another batch of expensive movie trailers for films coming our way this summer.
There were talking birds, talking lizards, pirates, dinosaurs, gigantic robots, alien monsters, vampires, super heroes, Nazis, Romans, cowboys, an Adam sandler nut shot, (let’s face it kids nothing is funnier than a nut shot, right?), Vin Diesel and Nicolas Cage’s angry hair. Enjoy.
JJ Abrahms & Steven Speilberg’s Super 8
Actually this is the only film out of the bunch below which we are actually looking forward to. Not much is known about the plot to Super 8 but the La Times managed to sit down with Abrams recently and he had this to say about his latest project:
‘The Paramount Pictures release is set in Ohio in 1979 and introduces a troupe of six youngsters who are using a Super 8 camera to make their own zombie movie. One fateful night, their project takes them to a lonely stretch of rural railroad tracks and, as the camera rolls, calamity strikes — a truck collides with an oncoming locomotive and a hellacious derailment fills the night with screaming metal and raining fire. Then something emerges from the wreckage, something decidedly inhuman.’
The Steven Speilberg produced TV series Terra Nova
Terra Nova looks like someone crammed The Swiss Family Robinson, Jurassic Park and Avatar into a blender and served it up with a lower budget.
This guy loves his country so much he wears a jump suit fashioned out of the star spangled banner.
Transformers 3: Dark Side Of The Moon.
Yet another hyperactive serving of large explosions, massive robots, enormous special effects and some tart pretending she’s Megan Fox.
Battle Los Angeles.
Substitute large robots for aliens and you have pretty much the same film as Transformers 3. Even the soundtrack to each of the trailers is almost exactly the same.
Yet another superhero origin story, this time it’s the blonde viking Norse god Thor with his mighty hammer…and Natalie Portman.
The boys are back in town. Diesel and Walker continue their homoerotic love affair on screen in between driving cars and being chased by The Rock.
Think Blade except more white, religiousy and in the future.
Just Go With It
Adam Sandler and Jennifer Anniston? Just get to fuck!
This time they’ve made birds talk and act like humans. Isn’t technology wonderful?
Pirates Of The Carribean: On Stranger Tides
Depp returns as Sparrow, some cast members have remained others have not, new ones appear to have filled in the gaps.
Cowboys & Aliens
This time aliens pop up in the Wild West. Hollywood sure is one creative place.
Drive Angry In 3D
Sorry, but we don’t like butter on our popcorn. But then again it’s in 3DEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
The only film along with Super 8 which we would actively seek out to watch. A talking lizard loosely based on Hunter S Thompson? We’re in.