Moronic Scottish Politician Claims Russia Is Invading Scotland.

It’s healthy and downright sensible to disbelieve pretty much every word a politician vomits up, especially if you live in Britain, or more specifically Scotland.

Yesterday in Westminster there was a debate about the renewal of Trident on the River Clyde, a process which is going to cost the tax payer a princely sum of £100b. As those for and against argued and debated Labour MP Brian Donohoe made the startling claim that Russian submarines were currently sailing up the Clyde.

That’s right, according to Donohoe those sneaky Russians under the orders of Putin himself were invading Scotland and he was the only man in the country who knew about it. Of course a quick cursory glance out of my window, which looks over the Clyde, confirmed that he was in fact talking a power of absolute shite…it was the North Koreans!


Black Friday Chaos In The UK.

This video was shoot in Tesco’s next to Glasgow’s Silverburn Shopping Centre, where customers were brawling over flat screen TVs which were for sale during Black Friday.

A day where people breath out of their mouths and buy even more shite they don’t need, with money they don’t have.

Work Your Ass Off At The MOBOs For Nothing.


The only opportunity volunteering ever provided was the prospect of yet more volunteering.


This year’s MOBO awards, which are being held in Glasgow, are running a special prize for Young Scots. If they have over 100 points on their Young Scot card they can enter this amazing prize draw to win the chance to work like a dog for absolutely no pay whatsoever at the event.

That’s right you may spend the night sweating like Rolf Harris in the dock with not a single penny to show for your effort but just think of all the wonderful talentless celebs, charged up on Gak, who will verbally abuse and berate you throughout the course of the evening. With not a single promise of a full or part time job at the end of proceedings.

Don’t miss out on this special prize draw for total exploitation if you have more than 100 points on your Young Scot card it’s time for a reward. Unpaid work.

Lazy Daily Mail Article Riles Up Jingoistic/Elitist Readership.

The Daily Mail’s website posted up an article today about supposed spelling mistakes by local authority workers on road signs across the country. They led with a picture, (above), of a road outside of Innellan Primary school near Dunoon in Argyll where the word ‘SCKOOL’ can be clearly seen in yellow lettering painted on the road. Of course to anyone passing this looks like a spelling mistake by council road workers, but there’s an altogether different explanation which the Daily Mail conveniently overlooked. Because facts, who needs them, right?

The real story is that a sub-contracted construction firm dug a trench across the road which ran right through the original yellow ‘H’. You can see in the picture where they’ve refilled and tarmaced over it. Of course the firm didn’t have any of the official road lettering stencils the council use nor did they have the specific yellow paint used by the roads department, so they left the ‘H’ without a middle bar and end stalk. The ‘K’, (which you can see in the picture), was actually painted in by a well known member of the public as a prank and has yet to be corrected. Of course I found out this information with a simple five minute phone call to a Dunoon based council worker and a local resident who lives near Innellan Primary and I’m not even a paid journalist.

Nothing unusual about the Daily Mail failing to check the facts on a story but what was interesting were the comments below the article. A heady mix of class elitism and straight-up jingoism. Nigel Farage would be proud:

DM 5

DM 4

DM 3

DM 2

DM 1


This Guy Wants You To Boycott Abercrombie & Fitch.

Warning: NSFW langauge.

This young man in the video above is Cameron Watt and he wants you to boycott Abercrombie & Fitch. Why? Well it’s not for the obvious reason that you look like a complete bell-end in their clothing, it’s actually a little more serious than that. Social segregation.


England Planned To Give Up Scotland To The Nazis.

With all the arguments for and against an independent Scotland swirling about the Internet, from now until the referendum, The Scottish Daily Telegraph felt the time was right to print this fascinating story about how England were willing to surrender Scotland to the Nazis if they invaded from the north. Whether you feel it contributes or detracts from the independence debate is entirely up to you.

UPDATE: The author of the book ‘If Hitler Comes’, whose work is referred to in this press cutting, has asked us to post a message from him stating that the Daily Express article completely misrepresents the research in his book. There is no truth in the statement that there was ‘A secret plan to let Nazis take Scotland’ nor in the statement that ‘England planned to give up Scotland to the Nazis’. He has written an article documenting the birth and development of the ‘factoid’ HERE

We would also like to point out that this post was merely highlighting the Daily Express article and we refrained from making any personal opinion on the content of the piece. Our headline was a general paraphrase of the source. We would also like to point out that if anyone has an issue with the content of the featured article then he/she should make contact with the journalist Rod Mills directly.

Six Year Old Scottish Drama To Be Major US Series.

This is a strange one indeed. Back in 2006 I remember thoroughly enjoying a BBC detective mini-series entitled Low Winter Sun. It was unashamedly Scottish in its grit and tone and at times was a tad gruelling for the viewer, but the major plotline rattled along like so:

Frank Agnew (Mark Strong) is a law abiding detective at Blackmoss CID in Edinburgh. When his girlfriend Sinada goes missing, his colleague Joe Geddes informs him that his corrupt partner Brendan McCann has murdered her and so Agnew, with Geddes’ help, takes revenge. 

Fast forward six years and American TV channel AMC have the rights to the series and have filmed a remake only this time instead of Edinburgh, Frank Agnew is now a troubled detective out for revenge on the streets of Detroit. Most of the characters in the original have been retained, (albeit played by different actors), with actor Mark Strong returning as the lead once more. Although I’ll doubt he’ll keep the Scottish accent. Apparently AMC have ordered 10 hour long episodes for the first season which means the original plot of the BBC two-parter will either be stretched beyond capacity or there will be a lot more filler, which might not necessarily be a good thing.




Scottish Flags Deemed ‘Offensive’ For Fire Engines.

This is one of those stories you need to re-read just to make sure it’s authentic.

The Daily Record is today reporting that a recent complaint was made to Aberdeen fire chiefs regarding the vinyl based Saltire flags which were stuck onto the front of two of their fire engines.

They were placed on the new vehicles to mark the merger of Scotland’s eight brigades into one, but the mere sight of the St Andrew’s cross on the fire engines enraged one member of public so much that he/she made a formal complaint and they were duly removed. It’s thought that the complaint was politically motivated as it’s been suggested that the person, (with far too much spare time on their hands), saw the flags as being a sign of ‘pro-independence’.

Really? The St Andrew’s cross is now offensive to people? Shall it now too find it’s way into the same bracket of offensive flags such as the Swastika, Confederate or White Power flags?

To read the entire story chart a course for The Daily Record.


Burnistoun Series 3 Starts Tonight.

If your post-Olympic hangover is currently in full swing then you could do worse than tune into the third and final series of Scottish comedy sketch show Burnistoun, which airs tonight at 10pm on BBC2.

Just to be sure to avoid all London 2012 withdrawl symptoms of happiness and joy-joy go ahead and follow Burnistoun creators Robert Florence and Iain Connell on Twitter for further hilarity. You can thank me later.