The Weather Is Wetter Than An Otter’s Pocket.

Oh dear Carol, next time it might be worth a little check on the old Viz Profanisaurus:

“Wet as an otter’s pocket”>wet as an otter’s pocket” – sim. Descriptive of the moistness of an object, eg. a face flannel, a raincoat, a frothing gash. The interior state of a woman’s genitalia when considerably aroused.

‘Marjorie let out a little squeal when Fernando hoisted her up into his rippling, muscular arms. Her shock was eclipsed by her embarrassment for she knew she was as wet as an otters pocket.’

Goes without saying that Alan from North Yorkshire is now a local legend.

Hey BBC! WTF Is This?

The video above is a festive themed trailer filmed for BBC One to promote their Christmas schedule to the tune of Oliver’s ‘Consider Yourself‘, (should have been ‘Have A Word With Yourself‘)

There is nothing and we mean nothing about this trailer which gets us even remotely excited by the programmes on offer, but then there’s hardly anything on the Beeb that entices us anyway from Eastenders and Strictly Come Dancing, to Live At The Appollo and Dr Who, (oh yes we just did). Boring, staid, unexciting, routine British programming fare. It’ll be a bottle of two litre White Lightening cider and a blu-ray copy of Fast Five for us this Christmas Day.