Battlefield V Trailer Pushed Bro Gamers Over The Edge.

Last night, live on YouTube the new Battlefield game trailer was revealed and like everything nowadays there soon followed much foaming at the mouth and spitting of rage.

A certain section of gamers and fans of the series went apocalyptic over the use of a female character in the trailer, raging at the developers for being ‘historically inaccurate’ with the new content, because it featured a woman.

Last night, live on YouTube the new Battlefield game trailer was revealed and like everything nowadays there soon followed much foaming at the mouth and spitting of rage.

A certain section of gamers and fans of the series went apocalyptic over the use of a female character in the trailer, raging at the developers for being ‘historically inaccurate’ with the new content, because it featured a woman.

It didn’t matter that tanks careered through buildings, trucks were dropping out of the sky, planes were crashing all around whilst soldiers, complete with facepaint, biker jackets, mohawk hair and metal prosthetic hands were jumping through top floor windows unscathed. No, these excessive, disproportionate details were fine, it was the inclusion of a female character which shat all over every aspect of the ‘historical accuracy’ this game was selling.

It’s a fucking video game with over-the-top action which is engineered to excite and entertain the player and the only true way this can be achieved is when reality is detached. Unsurpisingly the trailer took a beating on social media with bro-gamers using the hashtags #genderfield and #notmybattlefield.

Fans, who weren’t gagging on their toxic masculinity, were delighted to learn that the new Battlefield game won’t have a pay to win system or premium pass, meaning loot boxes won’t feature and once you buy the game any additional content will be free. Personally we can’t wait to see more.

Battlefield V is scheduled for release on Ocotber 19th.

The Only Game You Need To Own This Xmas.

With a ton of triple A gaming titles scheduled for release before Christmas including Call Of Duty: Modern Warfare 3, Saints Row The Third, Uncharted 3, Oblivion: Skyrim, Rage, Battlefield 3 and Batman: Arkham City to name but a few, there is only one title you should be gearing up for, a game so realistic and grimy it’s like you’re actually there, a game where your sole objective is to keep the city’s streets clean…quite literally.

Just look at that realistic dirt inertia!

How can you not get excited about Street Cleaning Simulator? Here’s the game’s official synopsis:

Brush off the dirt and make a clean sweep as you embark on a career to become an accomplished street cleaner. Choose from a selection of highly detailed sweeping machines as you navigate the city in search of detritus. From industrial areas, to residential and retail districts to motorways and even fairgrounds your skills are much in demand to bring shine and sparkle to the city.
As your experience grows, so will your tasks as you have to deal with ever more complex contamination using authentic clean-up techniques. With individually controllable brushes on your vehicle, along with manual management of the water tank, dirt traps and fuel, each vehicle is the ultimate in realistic simulation, complete with full 3D cab views.
Get up close to the grime with custom zoomed camera views and a dynamic particle system as your cleaning vehicle devours the dust in 14 challenging missions.

Polish up your business as you spend your hard earned income on upgrades and additional vehicles.

Consider yourself bought Street Cleaning Simulator. Discarded syringes and johnny bags be warned, you’re on borrowed time! Can’t wait for the special London Riot Clean-Up DLC.


 

 

Obsessive Gamer Is Upset About Diablo III

 

It’s amazing to us that people can get so animated and angry about the small trivial things in life but always keep schtum over the bigger issues.

That said this is a frightening example of where the human race is headed. WALL-E is starting to look like our generation’s 1984.

UPDATE: He was just fooling us all, he is in fact an educated, well spoken gentleman who just happens to like games, he actually has a host of videos where he appears as an angry gaming nerd with a lisp called Francis, he probably makes these videos to play up to the stereotypes of gamers and is in effect ‘trolling’ the ‘trolls’, that and the fact he’s trying to get more people to follow his videos on YouTube. In other words he’s a f@cking liar!

Samuel L. Jackson Loves To Play Black Ops.

That’s not exactly true this is just some sad lonely character who has never kissed a girl on the lips before gamer using a Samuel L. Jackson soundboard while playing Call Of Duty: Black Ops. Can’t wait to see and hear the Graham Norton Black Ops soundboard in action.

(via I Heart Chaos)

The Abuse Female Gamers Have to Deal With.

If you play video games online then you’ll be no stranger to the amount of hate speech that happens during a session. From racism to bigotry, from homophobia to general verbal bullying the gaming world can be a very ugly and unforgiving place. With a steady rise in female gamers and those women who have become addicted to the world of gaming it was only a matter of time before the sexist insults, creepy behaviour and degrading suggestions started.

Website Fat, Ugly or Slutty is run by three female gamers who felt that it was about time to collect all of these outrageous comments female gamers receive on a daily basis and post them up on the Internet for everyone to see. Their agenda wasn’t to deliberately name and shame but instead to poke fun and laugh at the idiots who felt the need to send private insults following a game. In their own words:

“If having these messages posted online makes someone think twice about writing and sending a detailed description of their genitals, great! And if not? We’ll all have another submission to laugh at.”

But it’s not all light hearted abuse, the majority of the stuff featured on their website is dark and disturbing, from the Iraq war veteran who promises to hunt a female gamer down to kill her, to the creep who sent three separate audio messages on a girl’s Xbox live account asking to hear her voice.

Ironically the girl’s are now receiving abusive comments online through their website about posting abusive comments online from the female gaming community on their website. Hollywood couldn’t write this shit.

South Korea Hates Gamers.

Here’s just one image from a slideshow of many which you can view over at All Voices of a South Korean boot camp for ill disciplined children, many of whom have become addicted to playing video games. Apparently a crack squad of Korean military psychotherapists have discovered that by stripping children to the waist and have them rub snow onto their exposed flesh will in fact rid them of any further desire to play a games console. It’s science and you can’t argue with it.

Many of the kids who are forced to attend these camps by their parents openly confess that they’ve become obsessed with games and  as one training instructor explained: “Nowadays, the children are selfish and really dependent to parents. They even become violent and disrespect the older. Moreover they easily quit whenever encountering problems. It can not be accepted in our country. For that reason, the parents would like to send their children to the military training course to help them to be better and win themselves”.

Here’s an idea, let’s just put this out there but how about a similar military boot camp for the work shy, lazy, reality television addicted parents? You know the ones who have quite clearly failed at bringing up their kids and are so idle they’d rather let the military take care of them? Just a thought.

(via All Voices)

Avast! Batman: Arkham City Trailer.

Holy Schnikes Batman! Here’s the trailer for the sequel to Warner Bros Interactive Entertainament’s highly popular console game Batman: Arkham Asylum, which proved itself a smash hit with gamers across different platforms. This new game, Batman: Arkham City, promises to expand on all the elements that made it predecessor so successful, while at the same time expanding on Batman’s story and adding in a new villain Prof  Hugo Strange.

Did I lock the front door?