Michael Bay Trailer For Need For Speed: The Run.

The opening credit reads: ‘A trailer through the eyes of Michael Bay.’ WTF? Does this mean that while we’re watching this trailer we’re actually inside movie director Michael Bay’s head, watching the same trailer that he’s watching only he has no idea we’re watching the same trailer while we’re all crammed inside of his head? And cue sound effect.

This is in fact the commercial advert for the soon to be released game Need For Speed: The Run, where players have to race from San Francisco to New York to save their lives, or win a prize, or steal a kiss from a good looking girl or save Macaulay Culkin from a swarm of angry bees, who cares it’s just a driving game. You know if we hadn’t been informed before we saw this trailer that Michael Bay had directed it we would never have known…not even from stills like the ones below…never…nope…not in a million years…no way.

Arse.

'Merica!

Avast! Trailer For Transformers: Dark Of The Moon.

What else is there to say about the third installment in the Transformers franchise that hasn’t already been said? Directed by Michael Bay and starring once more Shia LaBeouf it comes with all the usual loud, over the top explosions, cliched dialogue, weak storyline, hammy acting and far fetched set pieces. But strangely even though we know it’s not good for us we want it, we want the entire thing, we want to eat every last piece of it up until our bellies are full with CGI robots and the destruction of planet earth.

Here’s the official synopsis of the film:

The Autobots, led by Optimus Prime, are back in action, taking on the evil Decepticons, who are determined to avenge their defeat in 2009’s Transformers Revenge of the Fallen. In this new movie, the Autobots and Decepticons become involved in a perilous space race between the U.S. and Russia, and once again human Sam Witwicky has to come to the aid of his robot friends. There’s new characters too, including a new villain in the form of Shockwave, a longtime “Transformers” character who rules Cybertron while the Autobots and Decepticons battle it out on Earth.

Zombies Vs Robots Is A Go.

With Cowboys & Aliens set for general release this summer colossal nerds movie fans can now look ahead in feverish anticipation to a similar project which has just been given the green light by Sony Pictures.

*(Here’s hoping our first draft script of Ninjas vs Pirates vs Knights vs Vampires vs Werewolves vs Hoodies, will now be considered)*

Zombies Vs Robots will be a dynamic new film, based on a series of graphic novels, which tells the story of robots brought back from the future through a time travelling gateway created by scientists. They inadvertently bring with them an infection which wipes out the human race, turning most into blood thirsty zombies, except for one immune child. Realising that the infant is all of what remains of the human race the robots vow to protect the child until they figure out a way to clone the baby to reboot humanity. But zombies being zombies want brains and will stop at nothing to ensure the last living human is eaten. Cue a full scale war between Robots and Zombies.

By the way did we mention that Michael Bay is to direct? Yes, we too had the same reaction. (via Geeks Of Doom)

HMS Friday’s Top 5 L.A. Alien Invasion Movies

Above is the latest trailer for Battle: Los Angeles. Yes it’s another alien invasion movie. Yes, it’s set in L.A. (again), but doesn’t it look good? All that sweaty tension, shaky camera work and open mouths. It’s directed by South African film maker Jonathan Liebesman whose most notable film to date is the Texas Chainsaw Massacre remake. It stars Aaron Eckhart and Michelle Rodriguez, so no prizes for guessing her character will probably buy the farm by the end of the film.

With the release of this trailer and Skyline, yet another alien invasion/visitation movie set in the City Of Angels, we compiled our very own Top 5 list for alien invasion movies set in L.A.

5. V – The Original Mini-Series – (we know it’s not a movie, so shut your whore mouth), starring Beastmaster Marc Singer, who famously turned down the role of Connor Macleod in Highlander due to his commitment to the series. It also featured a plethora of young, talented American women in tight fitting jumpsuits as well as staple 80s bad-ass Michael Ironside and Freddy Krueger in a bow tie.

4. Transformers – Gigantic alien robots, which can change into everyday vehicles, drop off for a visit on earth to wage a monumental battle against each other, helped and hindered by humans along the way. It’s deafening and filled with eye watering special effects and Megan Fox is in it. How can you possibly loose?

3. The Hidden – Where do we start with this underrated classic? The basic premise is an alien lands on earth inhabits the bodies of innocent men and women and does a lot of bad things and by bad we mean insanely great things like stealing sports cars, robbing banks and firing rocket launchers at the police. Think The Thing spliced with Grand Theft Auto but with loads more polyester suits, big hair and shoulder pads. The Hidden has another classic 80’s cast starring Kyle Maclachlan before he went on to appear in Twin Peaks and Showgirls. Alongside him was Michael Nouri fresh from his Flashdance fame, Clauida Christian, or for those of you who have never kissed a girl before  Commander Susan Ivanova from Babylon 5, Ed O’Ross the bad guy from Red Heat and Another 48 Hours and Chris Mulkey who also appeared in Twin Peaks and more recently Cloverfield and 24.

2. Alien Nation – Made in 1988 but depicting a future of 1991? Where an alien race known as The Newcomers have settled and integrated in Los Angeles much to the anger and frustration of the local populus. A balding James Caan plays Sykes, a bigoted hard ass cop who is reluctantly partnered with alien detective Sam Francisco played by Mandy Patinkin who have to try to solve the death of Sykes’ partner which involves a Newcomer businessman, played by an even balder Terence Stamp and his plans to mass produce an alien drug called Jabroka.

1. Predator 2 – Oh yes! The ageless Danny Glover replaces Big Arnie, the jungle is now the concrete jungle of L.A, (see how clever they were?), and once more the alien predator returns to hunt down more unsuspecting humans. Glover and a team of four other detectives, including Gary Busey, and Bill Paxton, (the appearance of these two alone merits it’s number one position), try to hunt down the alien invader in the middle of a heat wave and an on going gang war between heavily armed Columbians and Jamicans.  In our own humble opinion this is the best Predator sequel there has ever been.


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‘Bumblebee Was In The Back, Where He Couldn’t See.’

Film director Michael Bay has encountered yet more real-life drama on the set of his latest and third installment of his beloved Transformer’s franchise. Following a tragic accident involving a female extra who was left brain damaged after a piece of flying metal from a stunt sequence hit her on the head on the set of Transformers: Dark Side Of The Moon, a stunt driver has now written off the Bumblebee car after colliding with a police SUV. The accident, which was caught on film, happened as a veteran police officer was racing through the film set to answer an emergency call in the city of Chicago where…Whoah! Wait a minute. You mean these robots aren’t real?