Begad! Trailer For Disney’s Chimpanzee.

WARNING: Due to the significant cuteness overload throughout this trailer you may experience the following side effects:

A strange tightening of the throat. The need to swallow hard. The sudden formation of a film of water across both eyes and a fuzzy feeling across your teeth.

This is the trailer for Disneynature’s Chimpanzee a documentary which records the plight of a three year-old chimp¬† who is suddenly left an orphan and is then raised by a single older chimp. Directed by Alistair Fothergill and Mark Linfield, who’s collective work includes Blue Planet, Deep Blue and Planet Earth the entire documentary catches a remarkable story shot on the Ivory Coast and Ugandan rain forest.

Chimpanzee will be released in cinemas on April 20th, Earth Day, 2012.

*rings out handkerchief into bucket*

Avast! Warrior Trailer.

A quick word of warning before you watch this trailer for the film Warrior, which stars Joel Edgerton, (Smokin’ Aces, Star Wars: Revenge Of The Sith) and Tom Hardy, (Bronson, Inception), it spoils the entire film. It’s so criminally bad it butchers every secret twist and turn of the plot right up to exposing the film’s concluding set piece. You’ve been warned.

On a side note Warrior looks like every other sporting film ever made, ticking all the boxes other sports movies have ticked before it; training montage, inspirational comeback, family conflicts, one last shot at glory, blah, blah, blah. But we’ll watch it for only one reason. This guy is in it…

…and he’s f@cking awesome!

Avast! Trailer For Mission In-Frickin-Sanity.

Go! Go! Go! Here’s the trailer for the fifth installment of The Fast and The Furious franchise creatively entitled Fast Five. Fans will be pleased to know that Vin Diesel and Paul Walker continue¬† their homoerotic bromance for each other but this time they’re off to the slums of Rio, where no doubt vacuum sealed t-shirts will be soaked through with sweat as they’re pursued by none other than The Rock himself. Actually the prospect of both Diesel and Johnson sharing screen time together could lead to a rip in the space time continuum due to the overload of testosterone and facial grimacing. This shit just got real!

I'll think you'll find my shirt is the tightest.

Liam Neeson’s Bad Ass Tour Of Europe Part Deux.

Here’s the trailer for Liam’ Easter Island Head’ Nessons’ latest film Unknown. Apart from giving away what appears to be not just the entire plot but almost the entire film, the trailer once more teaches us two important lessons: 1) Mr Neeson really needs to stay away from Europe, (see Taken) and 2) Although he plays the part of a man who has forgotten everything he somehow still remembers how to inflict pain through a hybrid style of street kung-fu and knows how to expertly use a range of evasive driving techniques.

N.B. No matter how bad your head trauma was you would never forget nailing Don Draper’s wife. Fact!

Avast! I Am Number Four Trailer

Here’s a teaser trailer for a movie called I Am Number Four, directed by DJ Caruso whose previous works have included Disturbia and Eagle Eye and he’s slated to direct the film version of the popular sci-fi survival horror console game Dead Space. Starring ex-teenage Burberry model Alex Pettyfer the film tells the story of refugee John Smith, (scriptwriters pushed the boat out there), who is one of nine gifted children who along with their individual gaurdians have escaped their home planet of Lorien for earth. But here they are hunted and killed by their enemies in numeric order and three have already been exterminated.

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